Election Year etc.

Mrs. Stillman. keeps telling me that now that I have lived with her longer than with any foster mother, I should call her ma, not Mrs. Still man. . So for the sake of a continuing supply of  “food” (if you can call it that), I will try.

  But I am quite sure she.is not a dog. She doesn’t look like a dog. She doesn’t smell like a dog (well sometimes) and she has very few barking skills.

As for the mom part, I’ve been studying genealogy lately, and it seems that I have had 100 puppies in my day whereas she has had none. I’ve learned that my grandfather was born in Ohio. My grandma was too. When they had my mother she was ripped away from them at an early age, shut in a box, hung by her fur at an auction, and ended up in Pennsylvania. That’s where I was born. Some one gave me a fake Pedi-greed, and sent me to a horrible puppy mill where I was treated like cattle (no! worse than cattle, they get to walk around) and otherwise neglected for ten years. The rest is dogstory, as you know. Get your government hands on those puppy mills, for Dog's sake!

The reason I have tried to find my real paperwork is that this is an election year, and I am once again running for president. Since I am as you can see, I am both black and white everybody keeps screaming that I am not a Christian, or even American. Isn't that ridiculous? So I’ve got to get my hands on my birth certificate to prove the latter and dispel the former. Actually I am not a Christian, dogs are atheists. So if anyone knows where my papers are, please let me know.

My platform will be the same as before which you can find in earlier posts.

With these corrections or additions.

1.     Death to the former regime (puppy mills).

2.    Free peanut butter for all dogs.

3.     Incarceration of all cats, (regardless of prior record)

4.    Freedom of a pigeon (whatever that means)

5.    Free peaches. (I prefer papayas but majority rules)

6.    The right to arm bears and other animals.

7.    Majority goes back to ruling

8.    We have the right to form packs as long as we don’t bite anybody.

9.    We will have a jury of our peeps (yum!), which will meet every Easter.to give out free candy.

10.  Dogs get to nap 23 hours and 59 minutes a day.

11.   And other stuff.

Remember when I told you that my cat came home with a space suit on? Well I found the picture of him that I was telling you about. Here it is, ha ha ha. 

Finally,

I just want everyone to know that it is not my fault for neglecting this Plog for so long. But I can’t get Mrs. stillman to take dictation for the life of me.

Besides She says I have nothing to say. How does she know, That’s what I’d like to know! The only reason she is typing for me right now is so she can avoid doing her taxes. I heard her say that into that ringing black thing.

Love Libby,   (as much as you can...)