Blog Archive

May 14, 2014

Free to Good Home



FREE TO GOOD HOME
HALF BLACK HALF WHITE ANNOYING POODLE
NO NEED TO CALL MRS STILLMAN
THE BACK DOOR IS OPEN
Just come in and take her when Mrs. Stillman’s car is not in driveway.
Make sure you pick the one that looks like this picture.  Not me!



No really!  I am just fed up with this little bitch.  Don’t tell me she’s my kid.  No kid of mine could possibly be this pesty, stupid, scaredy catty, pushy, in my wayish!

I don’t know why Mrs. Stillman thought I needed a friend.  I was perfectly cool begging her to take me with her wherever she went, including the bathroom.  She just does not understand me at all.

Okay so I am trying to take a nap, and the kid invades my dogonal space.  Really!  I can’t even tell where I end and she begins anymore.

 Help!!  Please get this dog outa here.  Mrs. Stillman won’t mind a bit.  I promise.

Oh and her name is Sweetie.  How cloyingly saccharin can you get?  Really.  She just thinks she is sooooo cute.  Plus she eats a lot, and tries to sneak my food just because I don’t want it.  Delay is no longer a word in this household.  Eat it or lose it is the modus operandi around here.
I tell you I am an absolute wreck.
Besides, Sweetie says she wants to leave anyway.  No really!  I might be deaf, but I can read minds.  I am sure she has her bags packed already.

So anyway, just come around and pick her up.  Our door is always open!

Yours truly,
Libby Stillman, the ONE and only.



1 comment:

Anonymous said...

Dear Brat Libby,
Get use to it it has only just begun. She's younger, faster, but not smarter. You just have to take advantage of your knowledge of Mrs. Stillman and blame everything bad on Sweetie. More later, Pal